By: Mike Kelly
Retired Pastor
Ever drifted away from someone you once loved? How many times have you heard someone say “I just don’t love them anymore.”?
Or “We used to be good friends but we sort of drifted apart.”? Or “I’m just not into them anymore.”?
Somewhere behind those words is pain, a grief, a loss. Someone once precious to us is no longer in our hearts in the same way.
Why did we drift apart? What changed? Sometimes it’s because our physical locations changed…one of us moved. Sometimes, we grow differently.
Our attitudes about things change and we see we are no longer who we have become when we’re together. Occasionally, the closer we got, the more we saw their warts and we’re repelled by what we witnessed.
Sometimes it isn’t so much drifting, as it is a conscious choice. We realize we are different around them and we don’t like how we act when beside them. Sometimes, they hurt us…generally inadvertently but hurt we are and we find we just can’t get past it.
Sometimes it’s our own immaturity that causes us to leave them behind. There might have been a better way to handle an issue than just storming off or cutting them off, or in today’s culture, unfriending them.
So, what is it when we drift away from God or just storm off and walk away? Let’s be honest. Not everyone of us is enamored with God all throughout our lives.
We are often excited and greatly relieved when we first meet him. He tells us of his love for us…his unconditional love for us. He forgives all our past indiscretions (Ok, call them what they are: sins).
He gives us a new identity and a new family. We were dead in our sins and now we are alive in Him. We were strangers and now we are his children.
But, over time, that relationship cools. Life gets in the way. Our passion fades. Prayer becomes another “to do” on our list.
Church is no longer exciting. The sermons are not feeding us. Quiet time gets shouted down by other priorities. And we drift away.
Jesus tells a parable, a short story with a spiritual meaning, about a farmer planting seeds and they fall on different kinds of ground.
The first type of ground is rocky and has no soil for the seed to bury in and grow. The fourth kind is fertile and the seed grows and produces a large crop.
It’s the middle two illustrations that interest me today. Matt 13:5-7 tells the story “Some seed fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow.
But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants.”
Somewhat unusually, Jesus took the time to fully explain what he was trying to get across to his hearers. Matt 13: 20-22 “The seed falling on rocky ground refers to someone who hears the word and at once receives it with joy.
But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away.
The seed falling among the thorns refers to someone who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke the word, making it unfruitful.”
Maybe one of those 2 seeds is you. Maybe you took the Good News and burned bright for a season, then you lost the passion and drifted away. Or, you accepted Christ’s offer of salvation but you lost focus.
The kids didn’t act any better. Your spouse wasn’t more loving. The bills just didn’t go away. Your depression didn’t magically lift. More and more things got onto your plate until there just wasn’t room for God. He became a chore and not a friend.
Few people “get it” then consciously reject Christ and walk away. It’s generally a gradual slide made slicker by not having a good foundation or by having too many balls in the air. Our relationship just becomes another chore in a life with already too much to do.
I’d like to say here that God understands and all is well. I’d like to say that but I’m not sure it would be true. Look at what he told the Church in Ephesus in Revelation 2:4-5: Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken the love you had at first.
Consider how far you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.”
Repent…turn around and go in a different direction. They were drifting away from God and their relationship with Him. Repent.
Ask forgiveness and go back to doing what you did at first when the relationship was vibrant and alive and life altering.
Praising God in all ways in all things. Talking to him as a friend and not a sugar daddy. Reading his Word with the intention of listening and following what it says! Caring for those around you…your brothers and your neighbors.
That last line is a strong warning. The lampstand is a symbol of the church’s ministry and witness in the world. If they fail to repent, Jesus implies that they will lose their purpose, influence, and even their relationship with him.
In essence, Jesus is reminding the church that a relationship with Him is not just about adherence to rules and doctrines, but about a living, loving, and passionate connection with Him. He urges them to rekindle that first love and restore their relationship to its former glory.
I’m guessing here but a lot of us have lost our first love passion over the years. And to an extent that is to be expected. Not the drifting away part but the bright shining part.
Like a marriage. Passion is still there but the depth of the love becomes the aspect the marriage hinges on. It’s about the relationship.
This article today is aimed at those who have lost that transforming relationship with God. No matter how it went…slipping or choked out…you know it is no longer there.
Maybe others can’t tell so much, but you know. Maybe you tell yourself God understands and maybe he does. Or maybe he is calling you to repentance today before he takes away your lampstand.
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Mike Kelly is the founding pastor of Bryan’s Grace Community Church (retired) and Board Chairman of Bryan’s Sanctuary Homeless Shelter and Williams County’s Compassion (free) Medical Clinic.