By: Amy Wendt
THE VILLAGE REPORTER
Former residents of West Unity, Tom and Eva Clendenen, have a lot to celebrate! In September of this year, they will commemorate their momentous Diamond Wedding Anniversary, a rare and extraordinary milestone.
Through nearly 75 years of love, commitment, and unwavering devotion, Tom and Eva have become an inspiration to many, embodying the true essence of lasting love.
Tom and Eva were separated by many miles during their formative years. Eva, the daughter of Charles and Myrtle Knisely, lived with her family on a farm north of Munson, Michigan just across the Ohio/Michigan state line. Though Eva was technically a resident of the Wolverine State, she attended Fayette School in Ohio.
On the other hand, Tom, the son of Rev. Carl and Opal Clendenen, grew up in Addison, Ohio, a small town nestled near the Ohio River with West Virginia just a stone’s throw away.
Because Tom’s father was a Nazarene minister who lead several churches over the years, the Clendenen family planted roots in many Ohio towns including Troy, Ohio, where Tom graduated from high school.
Life’s design orchestrated Tom and Eva’s first encounter. Upon graduating from high school in 1944, Eva enrolled at Olivet Nazarene College in Illinois.
As fate would have it, two years later, Tom did the same and the two first met in class.
“He was always late because he worked nights so when he came to class in the morning he was dragging,” Eva recalled of her husband.
“But he wanted to go to college and that’s the way he had to do it. His father was a pastor and not making much money.”
Tom added, “I kind of had an arrangement with the professor. He knew that it wasn’t because I was sleeping in … I was just getting off work and coming in as quickly as I could.”
Both teens worked part-time jobs to support their college education; Tom found employment at a manufacturing company making water heaters, while Eva contributed her efforts in the college cafeteria.
Eva laughed as she recalled the time that Tom asked her to go on their first date.
“He asked me to go on a date with him to see a table tennis tournament. When he asked me to go, he was being initiated to the ‘O Club’…a sporting club on campus.”
“His hair was full of corn starch and sticking up all over. He wore a burlap bag for an outfit – had it tied around with a rope and couldn’t have looked worse,” Eva said with a chuckle.
“He had the nerve to come and ask me for a date looking like that. So, I thought ‘Oh, he must be something special.’”
Later that week when Tom arrived to take Eva out, she was pleased to see that he was all cleaned up.
As planned, the two went to the gym to watch the ping pong tournament followed by ice cream with friends at “The Nook,” the campus restaurant.
After about eight months of dating Tom and Eva decided to spend the rest of their lives together.
“There were other girls in school who were flashier, who were popular with certain cliques or groups and yet I saw in Eva a sweetness that was – an inner spirit – that I could tell she was not only pretty on the outside, but she was also beautiful on the inside,” Tom offered.
On September 6, 1948, Tom Clendenen and Eva Knisely exchanged vows at the Fayette Church of the Nazarene. Tom’s father, Earl officiated the ceremony.
The newlyweds returned to Illinois following their union so that Tom could finish out his Sophomore year of college.
Eva opted to put her college education on hold so she could obtain employment and help Tom earn his degree.
In 1951, Tom accepted a position as pastor for a small church in Grover Hill, Ohio. The couple moved from Illinois to Ohio and lived in Grover Hill for three years.
Upon learning of an educational offering in Pasadena, California, the couple relocated again, this time to the Golden State.
Eva took the opportunity to complete her college education and she graduated from Pasadena Nazarene College, (now known as Point Loma Nazarene University) with a degree in teaching.
With degrees in education in hand, the couple hit the road again, moving to Minneapolis, Minnesota where Tom became a Christian Education Director and Eva taught school. They lived in Minnesota for five years.
California held a special place in the Clendenen’s hearts, and they moved back to the West Coast settling in Pasadena where they resided for nearly 30 years.
While living in the Pasadena area, the Clendenens were committed to their professions. Tom served as a school principal, while Eva pursued her career as a teacher. Together, they raised their two daughters, Vicki, and Dawn.
Whenever their schedules permitted over the years, the Clendenens enjoyed their favorite pastimes.
Tom had a deep passion for golf, and Eva supported his dedication to the sport, encouraging him to make the most of every chance to play.
On the other hand, Eva found much joy in entertaining and hosting many gatherings, inviting friends, family, and church youth to their home.
Church is also a very important piece in their family’s fabric and missionary work offered the Clendenen family many unique opportunities to see the world.
“I think maybe the greatest experience of our family was the time we spent in Peru in the Amazon jungles working with missionary kids.
Eva taught, I taught, and our girls were in this school … a very primitive jungle location that is right in the Amazon River area. We lived there for a year,” Tom fondly recalled.
“It was one of those novel experiences that you just can’t reproduce. It’s not like any other travel,” he added.
Over the years, Tom and Eva also worked with several youth groups which gave them more opportunities to explore the world.
They spent time in Mexico working with American Indians on the reservation and visited South Korea as part of a church mission to support the youth there.
As their children grew into adults, their daughter married a military man and moved to Germany. While on a visit, Tom and Eva spent time exploring Europe with the newly married couple, as well as on their own.
Despite living within a tight teacher’s budget, the Clendenens took every opportunity to explore the world by traveling to 26 countries and every state of the Union.
Tom explains that their ability to achieve this was made possible by a small but wisely invested “nest egg.”
Eva added, “We’ve gone so many places and have done so many things…we gained a lot of friends all over.
Friends from Minnesota, friends from Florida, our friends are all over. We’ve had a good life together.” “Those experiences are meaningful to us,” added Tom.
With retirement soon upon Tom and Eva, they decided a change of scenery was in order and moved into a beautiful golf course community near San Diego where they lived for 21 years.
For the golf enthusiast couple, the little community built on a mountainside was a perfect fit. Soon both Tom and Eva were presidents of their community’s men’s and women’s golf clubs.
Furthermore, Tom received the coveted title of “Champion” of their course on three or four separate occasions.
In honor of their 50th wedding anniversary, dubbed “The Year of Travel,” the Clendenens decided to break away from the conventional anniversary festivities.
Instead, they embarked on three separate journeys: one across England, Wales, Ireland, and Scotland; another exploring Canada; and the third within the United States attending their grandson’s wedding and reuniting with extended family.
For their 55th Anniversary, they pulled out all the stops and had a large celebration at the clubhouse of their golf course community.
The highlight of the evening was entertainment featuring special music selections from each decade that the couple had been together.
Fourteen years ago, after over 50 years of living in California, Tom and Eva decided it was time to move closer to Eva’s family and returned to Ohio settling in West Unity.
Rather than downsizing their abode as many retired couples typically do, the Clendenens purchased the beautiful 3,600 square-foot “Rings House” on U.S. Highway 127.
The stately “Rings House” is a notable building in West Unity as it was the first home completed in the village in 1835.
Now in their mid-nineties, the Clendenens recently decided to downsize, and in the early summer of 2023, they made yet another move to a Fairlawn Haven assisted living home in Archbold.
While going back to such a small home was an adjustment, Tom and Eva enjoy the convenience and amenities that the Fairlawn community provides its residents.
Looking back on their lifelong journey, the Clendenens reflected on some of the challenges they encountered during their nearly 75-year union.
Eva admits that at times, she struggled with the juggling act of raising children, managing household chores, cooking, and excelling in her teaching profession.
This dynamic proved to be one of the more challenging aspects she faced throughout the years. While many mothers today may relate to Eva’s experiences, it’s essential to keep in mind that the landscape of her time lacked the many of the conveniences we have today.
“Even though I was raised with a large family, and I had responsibilities there that were big, it’s different when you’re the person running the household,” added Eva.
Conversely, Tom discovered that the weight of providing for his family was one of the more demanding aspects for him.
“I think having the responsibility to provide for a family during the years when our income was not elaborate at all and that we struggled with finances. We budgeted everything.”
“We had little envelopes and we put our budgeted money in these envelopes that had written on the outside what it was for – rent, utilities, food.”
“We would put money into those ‘accounts’ and there were times when there was still time left in the month, but the money was gone. That was a challenge,” Tom elaborated.
“We are Christians, so we depend upon the Lord. One of our envelopes – the very first one, was tithing for the church and so 10 percent of our earnings went into that envelope first and then the others took their place according to how they could,” he continued.
Eva added to her husband’s thought, “I think financial challenges in a marriage – if you don’t use it as something against a person, can help you to grow.”
“You can spiritually, you can grow physically, you can grow mentally, and emotionally because you’re depending on your resources to completely help your family.”
Tom added, “But those kinds of things – I think make you – as Eva says, stronger as a family and brings you together when you’re working together to accomplish certain things.”
“I think if everything comes easy, it is detrimental to the unity of the family more so than if you are wanting just a little bit.”
After almost 75 years of marriage, it’s reasonable to believe that the Clendenens have accumulated valuable insights and strategies for a thriving marriage, which they could share with couples just beginning their journey together.
“I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that we started right out going to church and having fellowship with other believers and it was something that we could depend on if we had a need,” Eva shared.
“I think that because we used what God gave us and tried to be the kind of people that He would want us to be,” Eva continued.
Tom added, “And then we did things together. We square danced and we did ballroom dancing. We played golf together and went on weekends with other couples doing those kinds of things as well. So, we did things together.”
“Now beyond that, each of us had our interests, had our friends, and so forth and we did things that were not together. That was all within the pattern of what we wanted to have happen.”
Additionally, Eva feels that having a clear leader in the household is important. She believes that conflicting decisions between two people can lead to issues and there needs to be someone who makes the final decision.
Tom, on the other hand, thinks that one person always needing to be right can be problematic. The relationship can’t thrive if one constantly insists on being the right one and disregards the input from the other party.
“You have to be willing to accept each other and any input without it becoming an argument. Don’t make an argument out of everything that comes up,” advised Tom. “Mutual respect is probably a very key element to our successful marriage.”
While the Clendenens now experience a slower pace of life, they remain reasonably active in their current home at the Fairlawn Haven Assisted Living complex.
They find enjoyment in participating in various activities provided by the retirement community, such as luaus, potlucks, and Sunday brunches.
While they do not attend all Fairlawn events, they appreciate having these options readily available.
The Clendenens cherish the moments they can spend with their family when everyone is able to get together.
However, their grandchildren are scattered across different parts of the country so full family gatherings are few and far between.
They have two daughters, Vicki (Phil) Spurling of rural Archbold, and Dawn Clendenen who lives in Georgia. They also have five grandchildren, five great-grandchildren, and one great-great-grandchild.
With 75 years of marriage, a journey through various states, extensive travels, and a life dedicated to teaching and missionary work, the Clendenens have a remarkable and inspiring story to share.
Tom summed up their journey, “We feel like God has been good to us. And to give us the time together – to be together this long is really something … We’re thankful for the almost 75 years that we’ve had. They’ve been wonderful years.”
Amy can be reached at amy@thevillagereporter.com
