By: Steve Wilmot
A British publication asked its readers to submit their best definition of a friend. Thousands of people sent in their answers. The editorial staff selected this as the winning definition: “A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out.”
Jonathan, the son of King Saul, was that kind of friend to David. They enjoyed some pleasant times together, but their friendship was mostly marked by challenges and hard choices.
King Saul targeted David for extermination, but Jonathan stood with David rather than side with his father.
Something clicked in Jonathan the moment David volunteered to fight Goliath. When King Saul sent for David to evaluate his capability to defeat the giant, Jonathan would have been at his father’s side.
He overheard his father express his reservations about David abilities — “You’re not able to go out against this Philistine and fight him” (1 Samuel 17.33).
Saul clearly saw the contrast between them — Goliath had been a warrior from his youth; David is only a boy. The mismatch was obvious to the naked eye.
But Saul’s skepticism didn’t deter David. “The Lord… will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine” (1 Samuel 17.37).
When he heard David’s answer, Jonathan knew that he and David were cut from the same cloth. In David Jonathan found someone with the same attitude, same faith, and same confidence in God he had.
In that split second, “Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself” (1 Samuel 18.1). After David killed Goliath, and they met for the first time, “Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself” (1 Samuel 18.3).
A covenant is a binding bond of friendship and loyalty. It is a serious, unbreakable, unending, no-matter-what-happens promise of comradeship. As you’ll read in future chapters of 1 Samuel, Jonathan stood by his covenant with David even when it was costly.
Before Jonathan discovered he’d have to choose between David and his father, he already knew that loyalty to David would cost him the throne.
He stood first in line of succession as King Saul’s oldest son, the crown prince, heir to the throne. Everyone expected him to be the next king of Israel.
But somehow, Jonathan knew God had picked David as the next king instead of him. Without a hint of jealousy or enlisting in his father’s plot to eliminate his rival, Jonathan decided he’d rather obey God and befriend the future king to help him prepare for his reign.
So, during their initial meeting, Jonathan “took off the robe he was wearing and gave it to David, along with his tunic, and even his sword, his bow, and his belt” (1 Samuel 18.4).
This act seems odd to us, but it indicated Jonathan knew that David, not himself, would be the next king. “David, take these. You should be dressed and armed as the crown prince and future king of Israel.”
Never once do we read that Jonathan had second thoughts about his friendship with David. Even when it meant he’d never be king. Even when it turned his father against him.
Everyone needs at least one friend like Jonathan in their life. A friend who always loves no matter what it might cost him. Someone who stands beside you and cheers you on in times of adversity (see Proverbs 17.17).
A companion who reminds you of God’s faithfulness when the weight of hard times makes you forget. David’s son, King Solomon, stresses the necessity of a Jonathan in your life.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!” (Ecclesiastes 4.9-10).
Imagine David trying to endure 20 years as a fugitive from Saul without his devoted friend in his life. Twenty years of hiding in caves and out of the way places.
Two decades away from home and family. Frequently hungry and thirsty. Constant danger. Lonely, miserable, and dejected.
Times when harsh conditions seemed to have no end. Moments when his promised future as the king looked like a hollow fantasy.
Without Jonathan’s friendship, David’s life might have turned out radically different. It doesn’t matter how strong your faith is there are times when you need the strength, encouragement, support, prayers, and help of a trusted friend. A friend who can help you up when you fall.
Someone like Jonathan. You need a Jonathan, and someone needs you to be their Jonathan. Who is your Jonathan? Who calls you his/her Jonathan?
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Steve Wilmot is a former Edgerton, Ohio area pastor who now seeks “to still bear fruit in old age” through writing. He is the author of seven books designed to assist believers to make steady progress on their spiritual journey.